Handling Forgetfulness
We all know the middle of the day call from a kid and the frantic “I FORGOT_______!” that could blow out an ear drum.
So how do we respond?
First. We must have emotional control. Is that one forgotten item from this seven year old REALLY going to send us into a huffy spiral of irritation? Let’s just call it what it is: Our own lack of self-control. How can we expect them to be clear-headed if we get set off over something THIS small?
Now that THAT’S out of the way, how will we handle THIS?
If it’s the first time (and we have the ability to), let’s show them some grace. We ALL forget things. We ALL know the feeling of realizing we left that important document sitting on the kitchen table. Take it to them. And do it JOYFULLY. What is grace if it’s done with resistance? Maybe some anger sprinkled in there? Definitely not grace at all.
THEN we can have a conversation later.
So here’s the deal. They are NOT allowed to call frantically. They MUST control themselves and not allow their upset to take charge. We must require them to keep their emotions in check. Not stuff them down and let them fester like a pressure cooker, but force those emotions to stand in line and stay focused.
Then we should discuss the importance of responsibility and explain that next time, we might not be able to take the forgotten item to them. Make sure they know the consequences if it happens again. NOT that we will get angry or upset… But that we might not be able to be the delivery person. Make sure they understand that they are responsible for the repercussions of forgetfulness.
AND THEN…
If it happens again: Allow them face the natural consequences.
When they get home, take some time to come up with a system to help them solve the problem. There’s no perfect answer, but maybe these are a few suggestions that could help:
Before getting in the car, have them do one quick walk-through to grab any forgotten items.
Prep their bag the night before.
Have a designated area for items that aren’t in the normal flow of things like paperwork.
Make a daily checklist until it becomes habit.
By Lexi Brookey, 4th Degree Black Belt
Team Chip Abilene